It's been a challenging couple of months. School, life, and sadness have filled my life and I'll admit, i've placed God on the back burner. I go through these periods of life frequently; I talk to Jesus, I know he's there, but I don't actively seek Him out. He's not priority in my life, I am. It's a hard pill for me to swallow, and it's taken a while fot me to admit to myself that my relationship with Jesus is my own responsibility, not someone else's. No one can pray for me or build my relationship with Jesus and have it all nice and pretty and ready for me. That's just not reality. I thought that I could act like Jesus was first in my life and it would be okay, but He's slowly teaching me that putting Him second automatically places me at a disadvantage.
Think about when you first came to know the Lord (if you haven't come to know Him yet, I pray that you will experience the incredible love that is Jesus Christ). How did you come to know Jesus? Maybe through a friend, family member, bible school, a Sunday school teacher, whatever it maybe, remember how you found Jesus. For most of us, we learned about Jesus through word of mouth, someone told us about the incredible love that He shows us daily. For me, this looked like my parents taking me to Sunday school and church every Sunday, attending bible school, and going on mission trips. My parents and family planted the seed for me and my knowledge of Christ began growing at a young age. If they had not taught me about Christ, I wouldn't be anywhere close to the person I am today. I am a huge worrier. I live in fear of the unknown and stress myself out about every small detail and unplanned event. If I didn't know Jesus then my life would be so much more shambly than it already is. The Lord has mended my heart so much more than I can even fathom. But none of this would have happened had my parents not raised me in the church. At times, it was probably hard for them to get me dressed and carry me and my two brothers to church every Sunday, but they did and now I get to experience His love every single day. Sharing Christ isn't supposed to be comfortable, and for many of us it isn't. Like most things, evangelism scares me and a lot of anxiety surrounds the subject. In the book of James (which we're studying in my small group) chapter 2 talks about the sin of favoritism and it is a really convicting message. 2 My brothers,[a] show no partiality as you hold the faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory. 2 For if a man wearing a gold ring and fine clothing comes into your assembly, and a poor man in shabby clothing also comes in, 3 and if you pay attention to the one who wears the fine clothing and say, “You sit here in a good place,” while you say to the poor man, “You stand over there,” or, “Sit down at my feet,” 4 have you not then made distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts? 5 Listen, my beloved brothers, has not God chosen those who are poor in the world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom, which he has promised to those who love him? 6 But you have dishonored the poor man. Are not the rich the ones who oppress you, and the ones who drag you into court?7 Are they not the ones who blaspheme the honorable name by which you were called? 8 If you really fulfill the royal law according to the Scripture, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself,” you are doing well. 9 But if you show partiality, you are committing sin and are convicted by the law as transgressors. 10 For whoever keeps the whole law but fails in one point has become guilty of all of it. 11 For he who said, “Do not commit adultery,” also said, “Do not murder.” If you do not commit adultery but do murder, you have become a transgressor of the law. 12 So speak and so act as those who are to be judged under the law of liberty. 13 For judgment is without mercy to one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment. I know it's long, but there's such a great message hidden in there. Like many passages within the Bible, the meaning behind this message can be different for everyone. For me, it makes me uncomfortable. It's hard to understand that I sin just as much as someone who doesn't know the Lord or that my sin counts just the same as there's. The biggest thing I came to realize about this passage is that everyone on this earth is a sinner. There is no other commonality between all people other than our sin. Evangelism makes me uncomfortable because I'm sharing my faith with a complete stranger, but that stranger is really no different. We both sin, but I know my sin is forgiven and maybe they don't. God doesn't call us to live a comfortable life. It's hard to share your faith, but your comfort is not worth someone else's salvation.
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